La fin du semestre le plus infernal

Yes, I'm FINALLY home, and I wanted to do one last entry to describe my last few weeks in Strasbourg. To put it simply, they were stressful. Very stressful. My finals period was 9 days long, so the best strategy would have been to pace myself, but when you have an isolated few finals and then several finals one day after another, it makes it hard to multitask and study for finals ahead of time.

On Wednesday the 3rd, I went to my first class, my Comparative literature class, and was a little bit shocked when my professor called me up before class started. This was one of the 3 finals I was scheduled to have on December 13th, and, even though my French literature professor had already said I could use my exposé as my final, this other professor didn't know that. So she had arranged a special final for me on the following Tuesday...as in 6 days away. I decided to take the earlier final, because it would be 2 hours long (as compared to 4), meaning that I would probably have another question. But I panicked a little bit, because, being that this is France we're talking about and all instructions are vague, I hadn't done anything for the class, other than buy the books. I had literally done nothing. So for the next few days, instead of beginning to study for my other finals the following week, I crammed- Baudelaire, Michaux and Trakl, specifically- which was a really new feeling for me. I can safely say that I have never in my life crammed for an exam like I crammed for every single exam I took in France, and I must say that, even though my need to study in advance makes me a total nerd, at least I feel like I'm in somewhat good company at Georgetown. Luckily for me, I could use my books and a dictionary, so I did what I usually do and took copious notes in the margins as I read poem after poem. By the time Tuesday rolled around, I was just ready to be done, and, after my two-hour exam, I numbly left the building. I was mentally exhausted, although it was nothing compared to what I would feel within a week.

I don't know what I was doing between Tuesday afternoon and Friday, but somehow, on Friday afternoon, I found myself panicking- and cramming- again. After a trip to the gym, "to loosen up and temporarily banish a little bit of my stress", I hung out in bed, cramming with flashcards of every single date of French colonization and every literary prize ever won by a francophone author. This was for a "literature class." Lie. A literature class involves actually reading. We didn't read a thing. Later on in the afternoon, we had a study group at my friend Theresa's house, during which we realized how much we were in complete shambles. Our concentration was completely shot, which is not exactly conducive for last-minute studying. On Saturday morning, I was up at 6 to head over to Café Michel, my new favorite café (because, frankly, the personnel at Brant were becoming increasingly difficult to deal with, so it as time for a change). The Holy Cross girls rolled in one by one and we spent the entire morning studying...or, rather, trying to. Eventually, we all just accepted that we've developed ADD-like tendencies and dissolved into a fit of giggles in lieu of studying. We walked into our final- in a GINORMOUS amphitheater- and were nervous beyond belief. But I walked out of the exam feeling good, so I was satisfied. Again, I felt like I couldn't think anymore once I got out of the final, so I just accepted it and went to my last mass ever at the Cathedral. I took some videos before and after the mass (which I realize don't work for some reason if you don't have a Facebook account, so I'll consult my technical staff and try to get them up and working again) of the Christmas markets, and, more generally, the downtown part of Strasbourg. That was the first time that it really hit me how much I was going to miss France, but really, at this point, I had much bigger fish to fry.

So I had two exams down, and three more to go. One on Monday, which I spent almost all day Sunday studying for; one on Tuesday, the incredibly feared History of Alsace exam; and one on Thursday, for Religions and Societies in France and Germany, 1830-1914 (yes, I realize that it's a mouthful of a course title). The exam on Monday was fine- I finished in less than the allotted two hours- but immediately afterwards, I started stressing about Tuesday's exam. I had known, for over a month, that it was not going to be a pleasant exam to study for, but I just couldn't bring myself to start studying for it (and I also had so much other work to get done first that I really didn't even have time to study for it ahead of time). Also, immediately after my Monday exam, I was talking to my friend, and my phone died- as in, my SIM card ran out of minutes. And since I was already in the process of closing my French bank account, I couldn't recharge it, so, for the next few days, I felt like I was stuck in a boat with no paddle. I could receive calls and texts, but could not make them myself, so it was a week of pure frustration. So on Monday night, I quickly ate my dinner and then was in my room for the rest of the night, reading through lectures and outlines and attempting to make sense of the task at hand. Since there were 7 Americans in the class (me, two other Georgetown girls, and four Holy Cross girls), we had divided up the lectures and each done an outline for a lecture or a lecture-and-a-half, which was helpful, but it was still a lot of information to read through. I was fully prepared to pull my first ever all-nighter, so was pumping myself with black tea and was really wishing that I drank coffee. By about 3:30, though, I was not retaining any more information, so I went to sleep and got up at 6:30. I headed to Mich and was joined much later by the Holy Cross girls. I was hating life. I was dead tired, and all I wanted was a shot of espresso. And I felt like, despite having only slept for 3 hours, I hadn't actually picked up anything. I felt just as lost as I had before having started studying.

Cat, Theresa and I decided, at about noon, that we couldn't sit in the same place any longer, so we grabbed lunch at Fec, one of the student restaurants, and headed over to the PalaisU, where we sat outside our classroom for nearly 3 hours, quizzing each other and trying to make sense of it all. By the time 3:30, the start time for the exam, rolled around, we just wanted to be done. But, as I walked into the exam, I still felt like I didn't know anything. Well, let's just say that I received a gift- someone up there was looking out for me that day. The essay topic was very specific- much more specific than I had expected- and, to my surprise, it dealt with the "mendiant" orders, the Franciscans and Dominicans, which had been MY outline topic! It was really the only one that I could have written a halfway decent essay on, and I was done in two hours and fifteen minutes. I walked out of the exam feeling an unparalleled level of relief, and, to celebrate having finished that monster of an exam, the girls and I went out for tarte flambées and free drinks. I had a holiday party at Susan's house afterwards, but none of us stayed very long, since we had so much other work to do and exams to study for. I have never been as happy to get into bed and fall asleep as I was that night. I was absolutely exhausted.

I did study for my last exam, but the studying was a lot less intensive, because I knew that the format of the exam was a text commentary, so I knew that, even if I was short on facts, I would be able to comment on the text. It went well though, and I was the first person finished just about 2 hours in to the exam. When I got out of the final, I LITERALLY danced down the hall- I was absolutely ecstatic- and then proceeded to rock out to Christmas music, unable to wipe the smile off of my face or shake the overwhelming feeling of relief at being done. I went to the gym, and then met up with the Holy Cross girls to bake cookies (and essentially eat our combined weight in cookie dough). Then, we went to a little concert, and then moseyed on over to a pub for some drinks. It was an absolute blast, but it was sad because it was the last time I would see a few of the girls. I am so glad I got to know all of them, and I even got to meet the lone guy in the group that night, which was fun.

I have to take a little break, but I'll write again soon about my final day in Strasbourg, my long journey home (by way of Frankfurt and Dublin), and my re-entry into life into the US (just in time to depart again for Spain!)!!!

Sending you my love, and wishing you a merry Christmas and a happy and healthy New Year!!!

Kristen